“Shallow men believe in luck. Strong men believe in cause and effect.”
Ralph Waldo Emerson
Keep in mind fellow bloggers that hard work and determination is the “cause” and our ultimate success is the “effect”. Don’t worry about those “shallow” men, they leave more room for the rest of us. 😉
Follow your bliss and the universe will open doors where there were only walls.
Joseph Campbell
Poetry is a kind of magic that very few can create and even fewer can truly understand and appreciate in all its glory.
Dennis Gabor
Depression, Rage, Humiliation, Shame, Desire
These are all emotions that most people spend hundreds and even thousands of dollars trying to fix or hide from. Some go to shrinks. Some attempt to suppress their feelings with binges on food, alcohol, drugs, and even sex. And for some, the spiritual guru is the ultimate tool leading to their salvation.
I, too, have throughout my 33 years used every single one of the vices/remedies listed above to at the very least conceal my issues. Unfortunately, cupcakes, vodka, and random quotes on how to be a spiritual person have never helped. In my experience, they only lead to shame and ultimately humiliation.
No outside influence that I have found can demolish the ineradicable shell of pain that has taken up residence inside my heart and essence. I recently wrote a poem called Beauty, Hidden. It’s about how I sit and dream of writing something beautiful that will touch people on a heavenly level. However, during my poem I came to the realization that it will never happen. I am incapable of being “that” writer. As an artist, of any kind, we bring to the table our personal experiences. Those experiences not only shape us, but mold the canvases that are gifted to us. Now, I recognize where my gifts lay. The inner turmoil that has plagued me since childhood, that has manifested itself in unhealthy ways, was in reality my artistic gift. Thus, I have come to the conclusion that I will no longer fail at being something I was never meant to be in the first place.
Here, I sit, and I call to everyone who cares to read and hear my plea. Put down your needles, your half-empty bottles of poison, the cream-filled pastries, and the self-help books. Instead, pick a paint brush, a pencil, a laptop, a spray can, a chisel. Anything. Don’t hesitate to drain every lugubrious or outrageous feeling/observation into whatever canvas you can find. Don’t deny yourselves the privilege of standing before your creations, bare and hollow. Because this isn’t just a gift. It’s a calling. An obligation.
“I always start writing with a clean piece of paper and a dirty mind.”
—Patrick Dennis
I want to write
something beautiful
a collage
of graceful words that float
effortlessly
within minds, bewitched
by my timeless creations
captivated
and diving deeper
questioning
my true motivations.
However
The further I go
descending
into the abysmal
Stygian darkness
of my consciousness
all there is
is a bleak awareness
that encases
beauty and light
with frightful truths
and gruesome observations
suffocating and mutating it
until only
the fine dark lines
that surround life
can be cherished
and accepted.
“There is no great genius without a mixture of madness.”
Aristotle
“Follow your inner moonlight; don’t hide the madness.”
Allen Ginsberg
Blessed radiance
dimmed
beyond recognition.
Dreams, shredded
drift atop
gentle murky waves
of despondency.
audrey lexington 